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graphic Rejected again... GAH! graphic
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Zzyxx
*bursts into flame*



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 30 Sep 2004
PostPosted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 9:13 pm    Post subject: Rejected again... GAH!

Well, there was this girl see, and i really like her. I tried the whole confident gutsy strike a pose and say "Hey, would like to go on a date with me?" and she was ll like "No, we make better friends." outer Zzyxx = ... "It's cool..." inner Zzyxx = Crying
I have no luck with women...

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Ultrawolf
Mr. Roarke



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 04 Jul 2003
PostPosted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 9:32 pm    Post subject: Re: Rejected again... GAH!

Zzyxx wrote:
Well, there was this girl see, and i really like her. I tried the whole confident gutsy strike a pose and say "Hey, would like to go on a date with me?" and she was ll like "No, we make better friends." outer Zzyxx = ... "It's cool..." inner Zzyxx = Crying
I have no luck with women...


At least you were confident enough to tell her your feelings ^^.
Some of us still can't manage to do it. It's hard. Especially when you've been rejected all your life. It's hard to open your heart to anyone. Maybe you should be her friend. That way she can get to know you personally. Who knows, maybe someday she'll find out you're a good guy after all. Maybe, just maybe you'll get a happy ending ;D

Lemme ask ya, why do you like her?

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Zzyxx
*bursts into flame*



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 30 Sep 2004
PostPosted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 9:37 pm    Post subject:

To be fair, i have been rejected all my life. I'm actually starting to thing that the few girls i have gone out with were flukes, but to answer your question, Ultra,
I like her personality, she is very alive and i love it. It's intoxicating, so is her humor. She's Christian, which i actually have as a requirement for any lady i look at. To be fully honest, she looks really good too.

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Ultrawolf
Mr. Roarke



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 04 Jul 2003
PostPosted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 9:44 pm    Post subject:

Zzyxx wrote:
To be fair, i have been rejected all my life. I'm actually starting to thing that the few girls i have gone out with were flukes, but to answer your question, Ultra,
I like her personality, she is very alive and i love it. It's intoxicating, so is her humor. She's Christian, which i actually have as a requirement for any lady i look at. To be fully honest, she looks really good too.

That's cool. I like to fall in love with personality as well. Looks don't matter too much to me because I'm not a pretty boy myself Very Happy. I would rather have something that will last beyond good looks. Religion isn't an issue at all for me. I'm not really anything. Not atheist, I'm just not tied down to any particular religion. Razz That is very cool that you found someone with a wonderful personality ^^. I would say keep at it if there's any interest whatsoever. If you can show her the inside you then maybe she'll fall in love with that ^^ but hey I'm rambling Very Happy

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Zzyxx
*bursts into flame*



Gender: Gender:Male
Joined: 30 Sep 2004
PostPosted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 9:48 pm    Post subject:

I apreciate the encouragement, i will keep trying... i just wasn't expecting a set back so soon.

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Keiji
The Official Candy Kitty



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Joined: 04 Oct 2004
PostPosted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 9:59 pm    Post subject:

I think UltraWolfy's right about the friend thing....I would have loved to have this friend, who I get along with so very very well...then have something beautiful blossom from it after a while....Though with situation, I say...You have everything to lose...but also, everything to gain. Friend-romances are tricky...I went through one and lost evrything. But hey, that was in the past, and I'm happily engaged now.

This girl from what you said...she sounds like she would be so great for you...I say, just be friendly for now, and see what happens, try again in a little while ^^ Best of luck! *Candy Kitty-hugggles*

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shadokastur
Patience to see and strength to do. That is all.



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Joined: 26 Jan 2003
PostPosted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 10:36 pm    Post subject:

I'd say at this point it's crucial for you to really try to REMAIN friends with her. You had the bravery to honestly lay your feelings out to her and now, and I'm sure you are as well, she's afraid of losing you as a friend, especially if you two have shared the gift of laughter. If she does care for you, even as a friend, she's probably worried about the impact that this is having on you as well, even if it is excluding the intimate level of relationship. It might be difficult, but take time to sit with your feelings about her (your fondness for her and the hurt of rejection) and just feel them out. They might make you sad at first but stay with them and you will see that they don't really change WHO YOU ARE! Being true to yourself by knowing your feelings is the true realization of confidence. Learning and using this will help you shake off a lot of the detrimental effects of pain and frustration. Keep in mind if she starts acting hostile or cold toward you, just understand that this is a coping method. She may try either of these things to push you away in order to not hurt you anymore and to possibly avoid the guilt that she may experience for turning you down. Meaning: she doesn't want to see you in pain and believe herself to be the cause of it but she feels the way she feels for whatever reason and will see this as a way to protect you and herself from further injury.

And lastly, not knowing what's actually going on in somebody else's head is a sure-fire way to make your mind panic and draw flawed conclusions of it's own. So be sure that, when you can face her again and if you feel that you CAN be just (but still) friends with her, to let her know. Summon the courage one more time to tell (or if you think the words would be too much, find a way just to show her) her that you still want her as a friend and didn't mean to overstep your boundaries with her; and if you need some time to lick your wounds tell her when you can.

This was a bit verbose but I've been in that situation numerous times and know it pretty thoroughly. But still, this is just advice, take it or leave it.

REY

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Zzyxx
*bursts into flame*



Gender: Gender:Male
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PostPosted: Sun Feb 06, 2005 10:51 pm    Post subject:

I always take good advice, and that was good advice!

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Tobias
*explodes*


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 07, 2005 12:59 am    Post subject:

hey, you and me both senor.

I just told a girl my feelings for her, and i got the friend thing. But eh, there are others out there.

Just that this girl was really REALLY similar to me, which is something very rare.

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Therin
Gloompf. Iggle!



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PostPosted: Mon Feb 07, 2005 1:33 am    Post subject:

Well then, for the sake of discussion, here's another question.

If a girl has been hurt before, and has closed herself off, is there any way to help her heal?

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