hey guys.

Tobias · *explodes* Age: 38 Gender: Joined: 17 Jan 2003

I need some consolation from you guys. I don't ask it of you often enough, and there are other people that i should ask it from more often, but my written word is stronger than my spoken word, and i need to get this off of my chest, before it drives me to drink.

for those of you that talk to me more often that others, you would know that I recently had a relationship with a young lady that was working and living as an Ou Pair nanny in a nearby town. This girl i would go far enough to say that i loved, and she loved me back. The only problem came in two words: expired Visa.

Last monday, I personally took her to the airport. She was heading first to Jamaica, then back home to her native country of Austria. I had neglected to get my own ticket to go to Jamaica with her, since school was starting for me the day after i brought her to the airport, and that i didn't think i was going to become so fond of this girl. But the reprocussions are starting to hit, as anyone does when they must end a relationship on such terms as my own.

What can a man do when he is torn from someone that he loves, and cannot do anything about? This is why i turn to you guys...i don't know what to do. I live every day like i have lived, but it just feels empty. I knew that from the beginning, and so did she, yet we both went ahead and got as involved as we did with each other. We both knew of the problems that would arise at the end, and of the pain we would feel, yet we still became as close as we did. I come to you guys different in my heart. I don't feel I'm the same anymore, despite how I may act around my friends and collegues at work.

so like i've said maybe 3 or 4 times now: I turn to you guys. It hurts, and while i am coming out of it ok, and while we both agreed on seeing other people, i just don't feel the same. This is a first for me, and I didn't really think that it would have taken such a toll on me.

Thank you all for listening. I don't confide with you guys as much as i should, and i may have acted cold in the past for no particular reason. I hope that this has opened up reason as to why.

~Mike (Tobias)

Girkon · Chop Chop Fiend Gender: Joined: 29 Sep 2004

I feel for ya fellow romantic, it's gonna be a rough and tumble few weeks if not longer. Just try to take it day by day, and you'll be right as rain soon enough. Though it's not like you're totally out of contact. You can always write letters, maybe give a phone call, to kinda wean till you feel better too. If you two were as strongly connected as it sounds (and i'm guessing it's a lot) something will present itself. In the end you'll be alright, as a man in love we find the strength to endure.

kei · Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2006 1:43 am Post subject:

I know what your feeling I've been down that road sveral times my friend, hang in there buddy you'll make it. ^_- I cried 14 hours straight one day because a girls father didn't want to meet me just up and desided he hated me with out so much as a hello, we both wanted to be together so bad and it owuld have worked, up until her dad got in the way. I loved her, didn't know if she knew that but no other relationship i was previously in made me feel so shitty. Turst me my friend, you will strive on!

Blackmage · Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2006 2:01 am Post subject:

I know the feeling all to well, with a former girlfriend turned best friend, now best friend turned former, as we are no longer allowed to speak. Trust me its hard, it was a long and hard. It too me a month and 20 pounds of lost weight not eating to get over it. If you feel like talking just msg me when I'm around, regardless of how often people use it anymore I'm always an open ear.

Ming · DOOM! Gender: Joined: 13 Jan 2003

I hope you know that you can always talk to me about these things. It's funny though, because even though you don't realy show this emotion around the house, I had a feeling that this was going to come up at some point. Especially when I found out that she would be going home to Austria eventually. All I can say is that while you guys did get close to each other, you were only really together for a brief period of time, and you should be thankful for that fact, as this would be MUCH more difficult if you would have been together for say 1+ years. If anything, this is a good way to sort of ease into the whole dating thing.

But I do think you were right in your mutual decision to see other people. It's not fair to either of you to try to make something work from so far away.

But like I said, if you ever need to talk, you know that I'm just downstairs...

Tobias · *explodes* Age: 38 Gender: Joined: 17 Jan 2003

hehe...thx andy, i think im gonna utilize that. ANd thank you everyone. IT makes me feel a bit better. I've already spoken with her, and she said that since she's gotten to jamaica, shes been hit on by 4 people. She just responded that she had a boyfriend. makes me feel special Very Happy

*explodes*

ScrumYummy · bunnyhunches of scrums Gender: Joined: 29 Jun 2005

Awwww......this thread makes me sniffly.

I'm glad for you, though, that you didn't try to do the long distance thing. It would have caused more pain in the long run, and at least now you have a good memory of your time with her. Cherish that =)

Therin · Gloompf. Iggle! Gender: Joined: 24 Sep 2002

Give it time, man, give it time. That's all I can really say. It hurts, and there's nothing you can do about it, but it'll stop hurting and you'll get over it as time passes.

Shino · Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2006 2:53 pm Post subject:

kurjohoto the III · Posted: Sat Jan 21, 2006 1:08 am Post subject:

"Tis better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all."
I know right now it is hard to believe that but I believe it to be true and Shino is right if it didn't happen it was because it just wasn't meant to be and there is nothing we can really do about that but who knows what the future may hold. Always remmeber the good times you had and just believe in hope of a happier tomorrow.