JOKE OF THE DAY!! - dun worry! be happy!

[Kudasai Hiroki]

Two guys walk into a bar...
the third guy ducks.


*the crowd boos*

[ninja_panda]

Here's one...

At a train station three lawyers see three scientists only buy one ticket. They ask, "How will you all ride the train with one ticket," and the doctors say "just watch." The lawyers buy three tickets so thay can see what the scientists do. They all board the train and the lawyers sit down while the scientists all run to the bathroom. When the conductor comes around, he collects the lawyers tickets, then goes and taps on the bathroom door and says, "Ticket!" One scientist extends his hand to the conductor and gives him the ticket, and the conductor walks away. The lawyers think that's brilliant!
The next day they meet again and the lawyers buy one ticket and the scientists don't buy a single ticket. The lawyers are stunned, but don't comment. When they board the train, each group runs to the bathroom. One scientist steps out of their bathroom, walks over to the lawyers bathroom, knocks on the door, and says, "Tickets!"

[Skylah]

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.

Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book. Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says,

"Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"

"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, "Isn't that obvious?")

"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her.

"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading."

"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.

"But I haven't even touched you," says the Game Warden.

"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."

"Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.


MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.

[Skylah]

Math Student's Love Letter

My Dear Love,

Yesterday, I was passing by your rectangular house in trigonometric lane. There I saw you with your cute circular face, conical nose and spherical eyes, standing in your triangular garden.

Before seeing you, my heart was a null set, but when a vector of magnitude (likeness) from your eyes at a deviation of theta radians made a tangent to my heart, it differentiated.

My love for you is a quadratic equation with real roots, which only you can solve by making good binary relation with me. The cosine of my love for you extends to infinity. I promise that I should not resolve you into partial functions but if I do so, you can integrate me by applying the limits from zero to infinity.

You are as essential to me as an element to a set. The geometry of my life revolves around your acute personality. My love, if you do not meet me at parabola restaurant on date 10 at sunset, when the sun is making an angle of 160 degrees, my heart would be like a solved polynomial of degree 10. With love from your higher order derivatives of maxima and minima, of an unknown function.

Yours ever loving,
Pythagoras

[Sperrit]

Skylah, I gotta say, I can always count on you to cheer me up and make me feel good! The one about the woman in the boat is HILARIOUS!

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