The Tale of Goldie Gamer

[Alan]

Based on real and fake events

Goldie Gamer

One day, Goldie Gamer was prancing down the automotive forest known as King George Road when he got really, really bored. Goldie Gamer then found a seemingly empty video game store.

Goldie Gamer saw three consoles on display - the PS2, the Xbox, and the Gamecube. Goldie gamer wrapped his hands around the PS2 controller. "This controller is too small." said Godlie gamer.

Goldie Gamer then moved on and wrapped his hands around the Xbox controllers. "This one is too big, and the little one has bad button placement".

Goldie gamer then moved onto the Gamecube controller, his hands wrapped around it. "This one is just right! ^_^" Exclaimed Goldie Gamer. Goldie Gamer then stood for three and a half hours, staring at the TV in a trance-like way, playing Burnout. A foul stench filled the air as the big Sales Clerk Bear finally came out of the bathroom.

"Ugh. Those microwave burritos weren't the best idea in the world." Grumbled the bear before he went to play his games. He looked at the three consoles one by one.

~GASP!~ "Someone's been playing my PS2! I didn't get to save!" Growled the Sales Clerk Bear, before looking at the Xbox.

~GASP!~ "Someone been playing my Xbox! I was so close to getting the graffiti soul! T_T" cried the Sales Clerk Bear.

Sales Clerk Bear then looked at Goldie Gamer, still entranced by Burnout. ~GASP!~ "SOMEONE'S PLAYING MY GAMECUBE! MY STARFOX FILE! AND IT'S CLOSING TIME! NOOOOO!!!!" roared the Sales Clerk Bear.

With a deafening roar of anger, the Sales Clerk Bear tried to scare Goldie Gamer. But Goldie Gamer was still entranced. The Sales Clerk Bear just looked at Goldie Gamer. "Oh wait, he's playing the 'cube. No wonder. GETSKY!!!!" The bear mentioned to himself, hitting his head with his paw. Sales Clerk Bear hit Goldie Gamer over the head with the Xbox, took him home, and made a delicious meat pie - with mashed potatoes on top! And the Sales Clerk Bear lived happily ever after. Goldie Gamer on the other hand, now resides as a few particles in a sewage treatment plant.

[BWS-1]

Woohoo! Thx Alan!

hehehehe

*copy pastes post form PSOW

I'm sure we'll hear about this tale in centuries to come as THE classic video-game tale



Post count +1

[Sperrit]

Yummy! Beef (people?) Meat Pie! And, yeah, XBox controler = HUGE A$$ controler! Gotta love that game cube one... sweeeet.
I always thought that gamers would make better steaks than pies. I dunnot I'll have to try it Bwa ha ha haaaa! :hell:
j/k I may eat almost everything, but I don't eat people!

Join the Fun

[Therin]

It took me a little while to figure that last bit out, but that's pretty funny, dude! if you like that sort of word play satire, you may like books by Terry Pratchett, the series is called Discworld and basically, Terry makes fun of modern society while making really funny plays on words and writing really good stories...not to mention the pure ridiculousness that he also manages to get his characters into...I love that series! :p