A notice, regarding my life.

[Silver Adept]

Well, this is normally where I do the "sure, online I look good, but in person you might have reservations about me" buit, but I realize that some of the PO crew, however briefly, actually has seen me in person.

Not really long enough to make any judgments about my moral character, I'd guess.

So I could still pull that schitck, if I felt like it, but since I strive for honesty in both my on and off-line dealings, you've probably been exposed to the greater part of my actual self.

It becomes very hard to wiggle out of a compliment when that's happened, ya know?

[Sperrit]

Ha! I knew we'd wear you down in the end!
There is something to be said of that, though. It can be hard to be completely honest and fully yourself in online-dealings, but I found that when I went to AWA everyone was pretty much as I had known them on PO and through my communication with them. Therin and I would get sucked into our abstract coversations, Bekuki would go crazy (which was shocking and reassuring at the same time) Shandriz was as sweet as she had always been, Musashi was quite, but kind-hearted... There's something about this place and this people. I now trust my viewings of people here much more than I used to, and I think I can safely say that you're alright, Silver. You needn't beat yourself up so much. The mere fact that you ARE beating yourself up over whatever problem this is is merely a greater testimony to your undeniable membership to humanity, and a better part at humanity at that. I'm sure there are people out there who wouldn't have agonized about this nearly as much, and some even who wouldn't have cared. Your very prostrations point to the opposite conclussion, my friend.
Let's just say I'm glad we've got people like you on PO.

Join the Fun

[Silver Adept]

You know, that "opposite rule" seems to be used against me a lot when I get into these moods. I've never quite figured out how it works. It seems counterintuitive that because I'm beating myself up over it that it proves that I don't really need to beat myself up over it.

[Sperrit]

Actually I think the logic is more along the lines of: 1. You made a mistake 2. You care about making mistakes and/or hurting people through them Therefore: While you made a mistake, you are still a good guy.
Something like that.

Join the Fun

[Excel Zero]

Silver....I like to keep it simple by saying if you made no mistakes, you can't be able to afford yourself the oppurtunity to enjoy the good things in life.

Feel better and IM me if you need me

Exceliscious

[Silver Adept]

Well, I suppose I see the logic in it. I still think somehow that the mistake takes away the merit of being a good guy, and that the concern over it is not something that restores it, merely an acknowledgement of consequences.

To be the good guy again, I've got to convince myself that I am doing good. Right now, that's a little difficult.

As for enjoying the wonderful things in life, Excel, they have not been plentiful lately to be experiencing them. Perhaps I will be able to turn the corner on it after the study break.

[Keiji]

Well Silver, I dunno what happened, and it's none of my business...but from what I see, you messed up a bit, but since it bothers you so much, you care. If you were at all 'sub-human', you wouldn't be worried about it. I'm glad to have people like you around
I don't even really know you, as I haven't been around here much, but you seem like a great guy to me. *gives him big warm kitty hugs* Everyone makes mistakes, sometimes big, sometimes small, but they happen to everyone. Thank you for sharing your troubles with us and allowing us to help you.
We love you, man!

[Girkon]

At least you care nough bout it. So with that there will be plenty of chances to redeem the wrong that has been made. That can be quite the learning experience.